My Skin Controlled My Life

My name is Liza and this is the time I....kidding. Well, actually not kidding. This is the story and background to my love for skincare. I love to learn about it, read about it, and talk about it all of the time. It is something that I find joy in and I find joy in sharing the things I have learned...but I did not always feel joy about it lemme tell ya...

Road to 'Skin-ceptance'

I have never been the girl to have picture-perfect clear skin with zero blemishes or dark marks or fine lines....yeah no, not me! I experience all the works when it comes to all of that. My skin was something in high school that I cared so much about, but for the wrong reasons. If my face had even one blemish that could not be properly and cautiously covered up with concealer, my confidence was crushed (more than it already was in high school lets be real here).  

Anytime anyone would look at me I would think they were only looking at how my skin appeared. I struggled with cystic acne, hormonal acne (still do 😛✌), and acne from constant sweating from sports. Essentially...your girl's skin was never clear. It was so important to me that my skin was perfect that I tried countless products and DIYs and weird skincare hacks that are supposed to work. With this, my face got even angrier with me because I was putting so much product on it that it ended up doing the reverse effect. 

Eventually, I had my Mama (bless her sweetness) take me to the dermatologist to have her look at my skin. After taking some pictures and looking at my face for what seemed to be 4 hours, she told me that my acne was hormonal and a lot of it was from sweat. So here I am thinking...uhhhh lady I know you are certified and all but what in the heck am I supposed to do with that information. I can't really just stop my hormones and my life consists of 85% sports. I took a deep breath and then the tears came. But it was what my dermatologist said to me after that changed me. 

She told me to look at her in the eyes. Now...I am crying at this point and I have an extreme fear of professionals and authority so of course, I looked up nervously. She said to me, "I see people walk in here every single day with countless skincare needs and struggles. I see people with bumps and lumps and spots and dots. But right now, I am not seeing any of that. I see a girl, with beautiful eyes, a kind smile, and a mind that is way too hard on herself." For the remainder of the appointment, I was silent. I let that sink in until I left. 

Start of Skin Reset

I walked away that day thinking to myself that if this stranger could tell that I beat myself up over blemishes on my face, then what do the people who really know me think. More importantly, I realized just how hard on myself I was being. I went against anything I ever believed in about beauty. I preached to my friends all day long that their beauty comes within and that loving yourself is more important than any external feature. But, I didn't take my own advice. I crushed myself each morning when I looked in the mirror. I avoided people to save myself from them even looking at my face. 

My skin had consumed me to a point where I would do anything to have it fixed. I considered Accutane, prescriptions, topical creams, UV light therapy...yeah the whole 9 yards. But what I was doing was wasting my time. I was missing out on things, missing out on those moments that you make eye contact with someone, I was missing out on fun, laughter, and smiles with my friends. So, I took a very big step that was terrifying for me at the time and I did a full skin reset. What this means is I did not apply any product to my face. I wore zero makeup, put on zero creams, and only washed my face with a simple cleanser in the shower for 2 whole weeks. I needed the reset to allow my skin to start over, but also to allow my mind to start over. It was difficult and uncomfortable for a long time, but to my astonishment, my skin started to clear. My eyes started meeting other eyes in the hallway. 

The lesson I learned was that sometimes you just need to step back and simplify. Yes, with skincare this works and it does physically allow your skin to reset, but internally, my mind reset. Your skin is part of you. It goes with you wherever you go. It is as simple as that. So wherever you go (you and your new best friend aka your skin)...go with pride, go with your chin up, and understand that your skin does not get to have that control over your life. 

Oh and uh one last thing...you are beautiful all of the time...but I promise no one is looking that closely ;)